If you’re enjoying our pre-hurricane entertainment, pleased stay tuned for the post-hurricane relief effort. We’ll undoubtedly be showing you all the damage and downed trees that you could ever hope to see. It’s hard to imagine that you’re getting all of this for free.

The city appears to be a ghost town. This would be the perfect time to go run naked through the streets of Orlando. And then run back home because it’s getting breezy out there.

It would be much more interesting than the goth children picketing the Republicans on Colonial last weekend. I’m all for the cause, kids, but I’d take you a little more seriously if you spent more time on your signage than your hair. See, we’re much more than hurricanes, theme parks, and British tourists.

Dear Orlando Sentinel,

I call dibs on the “hurricane fatigue” story. You know, the one where you interview everyone who’s “so over” the potential disaster looming near the coast and you ponder the deeper meaning of it. It’s mine.

Love,
Katharine (age 5)